Living together b4 married?

1. I have a little saying "You don't know someone before you live with them." It is soooo true. I think everyone should be obligated to live with their significant other first before marriage.

2. I lived with my bf for 5 years before getting married and we have been married happily for 3 years- it's not moving in together before marriage that was the issue it's that you weren't meant to be together. Happiness is happiness married or not.

3. In this case, it was good. Because it kept you from marrying him. Aren't you glad that you didn't ?

4. well look at it this way, you could get married first, then have those exact smae problems with your husband, only it will be ten times worse cuz you cant just kick him out. living together before marriage is a good thing, it ensures you cant get along with the person before you actually commit to do it for the rest of your life. a jerk is still a jerk, whether youre married to the jerk or not

5. I say it is a great thing to live together before getting married. That way you can learn everyting about that person's habbits. You found out that he wasn't for you. Take this as one of life's lessions. Don't be afraid to try again.

6. I've actually been living with my boyfriend for over a year now, and it's been a very good experience. We take care of our own bills, but work together as a team to get house things done. We both have steady jobs, but still have time to cuddle and watch a movie before bed. We do date nights (we try every week, but sometimes we get pretty busy), anything to keep the spark there. If there's no spark, there's no relationship. If there's no relationship, there's no sense moving in together - or getting married for that reason. Living together has only shown me that I want to marry him that much more. I think it's a good thing to live together before marriage.

7. Well thankfully you didn't get married, I am old, but I do think living together first is a good way to try it, not to "play house" but to test the waters and see if you can make it on a day to day basis, a weekend in bed does not a marriage make. JMO

8. Cohabitation is not the best option for a committed couple. Why? Because if you are truly committed, you should make that statement publicly . . . you promise to be committed. Granted, marriage isn't what it used to be, but that doesn't mean the right marriages don't last. Next time, make sure you get to know the guy (some psychologists say for at least 1 1/2 years) before you make any sort of commitment, and let that commitment be marriage.

9. Perhaps it's better that one realizes she can't live with a man before she marries him. Would you rather be married and then come to lose respect for him? Then what are the options? Divorce? It seems better to find out if you can live under the same roof as someone before you are legally joined to him.

10. everybody has an opinion on this subject, but the way i see it is: you go through drama living together period. if you're going to commit to something, why not do it legally and honorably? i did it once and vowed to never again...some say it works for them, but i found that i have went through the same drama as i have married...

11. My husband and I lived together before we were married. We are very glad we did. It was the roughest 6 months of our relationship because we had to "adjust" to the other one and also needed to learn how to fight fair (without the screaming, yelling, name calling, bringing up old issues, etc). We have now been together more than five years and married 6 months...not long, but long enough to know we did the right thing. Honestly if it ended now, it probably would have ended if you had moved in after you were married. And moving out is a lot cheaper than a divorce.

12. My wife and I lived together for a few monthes about a year into our relationship and it just didn't work. We continued to date for another couple of years and then moved in together and got married about three weeks later. It is an adjustment, but I think the finality of our decision to get married made us realize that we had to comprimize unlike the first time week lived together.

13. Consider yourself lucky. Imagine if you married him. If you ever do it again make sure you do not have any financial mingling. It will keep it from being a mess if it doesn't work out.

14. No i believe it is a good idea, to test the relationship to see where its going. The same thing could happen if you got married then lived together. You would end up in a divorce. Its better to say if you are good together. If you guys cant live together as boyfriend and girlfriend then you probably wont last long married. Its better to break up then to have to get a divorce.

15. Wow. Im 17 and am planning to move in with my bf by next summer. but now im having second thoughts. I love him a lot and we have been together for two years now so there is that possibility that it might work. My mom always told me its better to live with someone BEFORE you make that commitment, just in case it doesnt work out like in your case. Good Luck

16. My sister is living with her fiance and they seem to be getting along fine. They are getting married in a year. Their love seems to be stronger than ever. They've been living together for two years now. I think it has to do with commitment and how much you really want it to work.

17. Well....I'm a psych major, and we had a discussion about this once. Our teacher said that as people live together, they get used to each other and when they get married there is really no excitement because after the party-ing, you go back to living the same way as before, nothing changes. It is actually a fact that couples who lived together before marriage have a greater chance at getting a divorce than those who didn't, something that before the lecture I thought false.

18. Newlyweds have problems because they don't know how to live with eachother. This is why it is said that the first year of marriage is the hardest. The first year of living together, may also be the hardest, so you need to be commited before living together, married or not. You may have looked at statistics that show that couples who live together divorce at a higher rate than couples who do not, but recent statistics show this isn't true anymore. In cases where it is true, it's usually because couples have unrealistic ideas about marriage such as getting married will fix their problems or that their roles as partners change after having a ceremony. It may also be because couples who live together get married to have children and it has been shown through numberous studies that children cause marital stress and unhappiness. In fact, couples are happiest pre-child and after the child has moved out (usually 18 to 25 years later). Why do you think there are so many divorced people with children??

19. I think live together and know if you can gt along first because thi i when you learn thir real habits.

20. If you hadn't moved in with him, you wouldnt have gotton to know him. Think about what would happen if you married him first. You would still lose respect for him, only then you would have to get a divorce.

21. that's why there is such a high divorce rate, a piece of paper changes nothing

22. I once heard from a well known phycologist that more marriages last when the couple did NOT live together first, statistically. But I think every situation is different. Lots of people live together first before getting married. I've done it twice, one breakup-one divorce. I think if you date a person for a long time and really get to know them there may not be a reason to live together before getting married. Many people will say it is like a trial run but you should know just about everything about the person you are going to marry anyway or it's too soon to marry them.

23. I lived together before marriage...but we got married. I think people live together and get married without knowing what kind of person you're with. Love is wonderful and necessary....but a relationship needs more than love.

24. Shacking up is generally not a good idea. If the relationship works -- which is usually not the case for people that aren't willing to commit beyond a rental agreement -- then it can be a springboard into a marriage. The advantage here is that you already know you'll work with 90% certainty once you tie the knot. HOWEVER, if it all goes south, you wind up on daytime court shows arguing for back rent and car payments, your star witness is your buddy that use to frequent Grateful Dead concerts, and you wind up showing the judge photos of the feces stains in your prized $50 futon. Oh, and did I mention you'll lose a lot of self-respect?

25. before getting into a a serious / committed relationship.. try to get to know the person first.... that is the golden rule.

26. I think it is smart to live together first. There are peolpe who can date but never live together so you might want to find that out first before. His underwear on the floor might drive you nuts and he might not care about it. I lived with my wife before we got married and 17 yrs later we stll are married.

27. Think about it this way, isn't better that you find out before there are legal documents saying you can live together and then the messy divorce, fighting over possessions and all the other stuff. Living together I feel is a great way to know if it actually is what both parties want. During the dating stage, people are generally on their best behavour. But once two people are living together day and night they discover things about each other that never appeared before. Most people who choose to live together before marriage do much better after the vows have been said. As far as respect goes, you respected yourself and him enough to give you both a chance at lasting happiness and love. So it didn't work out this time so what. Love is a crazy seesaw with it's ups and downs. No one has a perfect marriage, there are always problems that arise. It's not the problems, it's how we deal with them. So by living together we get the understanding of how each other reacts in different situations. And if we can't deal with the other person in some ways, if we can't compromise, if we can't look beyond those little idiosyncracies we all have then best to find out sooner than later.

28. Why aren't you the one who moved in with them?, they don't have a place or what?. If that's the case and you have your place, you are the provider, you are inverting roles in here, probably why you lost respect for him. That says the kind of man you date, and the kind of woman you are. It's a good idea to live together, but is a bad idea to get married. Watch out for states where after certain time is like you are legally married. And if you are planning on getting married, to what I don't see the reason, it's a good thing to live together and know for sure with who you are dealing. You don't want a box of surprise after papers are signed.

29. i dont think thats bad. trust me you are not the 1st one. worst girls would sleep with him anywhere(have S*x with them only hats worst. hink about it.

30. My husband and i moved in together 3 months before we got married and it was a great experience..We have been together 17&1/2 yrs and happily married 16&1/2 yrs...I am 39 and he is 43 now.