I met this one girl and we quickly became great friends. Then later, we became best friends! One night we were hanging out and she told me she had strong feelings for me. And at the time I really felt the same way.
A couple days later I realized she was my everything, and that I would do anything for her. I was in love with her, and she told me she felt the same way about me! We were about to start dating...
Until, Me and her got in a small argument about something stupid, and she changed her mind on me a lot! she told me right there I blew all my chances of us ever to date.
This was completely Devastating. She doesn't talk to me the same anymore, and she doesn't even treat me as her best friend anymore. But, I know deep down inside her she still has feelings for me, and I have no idea how i can Trigger those feelings. I really wanted to be with this girl and I had high hopes... Luckily, I still have time where I can make a difference.. What do I do?
Answers:
1. hey lost,
they question you need to ask yourself is... when you got into the argument; did you (yourself) believe that the argument was stupid?? And were you invalidating and dismissive to her feelings?? If that answer is yes to either question, then you need to figure out a way to apologize to her.
You see; If she changed her mind so quickly toward you... what ever the argument was... it was seemingly very important to her and whatever you said to her was probably hurtful to her as well.
You need to put yourself in her place and understand where she is coming from. If this apology is to ever happen.... whatever you do... DO NOT GET DEFENSIVE toward her and try NOT to explain your reaction!!! All that will do is convey to her that she was right the first time and your window will close for a long time. Just "listen" without judgment, understand and empathize with her and say that you are sorry. The rest is up to her... as long as you can validate her feelings and understand... That's all you can do.
I hope things work out
good luck
2. hey lost,
they question you need to ask yourself is... when you got into the argument; did you (yourself) believe that the argument was stupid?? And were you invalidating and dismissive to her feelings?? If that answer is yes to either question, then you need to figure out a way to apologize to her.
You see; If she changed her mind so quickly toward you... what ever the argument was... it was seemingly very important to her and whatever you said to her was probably hurtful to her as well.
You need to put yourself in her place and understand where she is coming from. If this apology is to ever happen.... whatever you do... DO NOT GET DEFENSIVE toward her and try NOT to explain your reaction!!! All that will do is convey to her that she was right the first time and your window will close for a long time. Just "listen" without judgment, understand and empathize with her and say that you are sorry. The rest is up to her... as long as you can validate her feelings and understand... That's all you can do.
I hope things work out
good luck
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