Im 19 and broke up with my first girlfriend about 8 months ago because she lost interest. Mentally this destroyed me as i remembered how because i didnt lead her, be enough of a challenge, ect. i blew my chance to have her, lose my virginity, ect. Those months proved to be a nightmare as I drove myself nuts trying to become a MAN in a woman's eyes. Now ive turned into something im not with women. Im an arrogant, uncaring, guy. It still has gotten me nowhere, but i know that women are more interested in me now. Its really a sad state of affairs, because behind the scenes im the same person, but to girls i have to put on a show of needless confidence. It destroys me, and it seems being myself wont create attraction so i must do these things. What do you think?
Answers:
1. I think you should be yourself dont let her know she got the best of u and that she hurt you and thats the reason you act the way you do...Nope still be nice w/ the ladies cuz in the long run it will all work out for u
2. Grow a pair, give yourself the time to get over it and move on. You're still VERY young. Don't let this paralyze you. You have to project the person you want to be instead of all this negative bull that is surrounding you now.
Did you ever think that maybe that relationship wasn't going to work anyway. People split for many reasons. You'll go nuts trying to chase after the dream.
3. 19 is not "old", buddy. You'll find a way! And you'll find the girl for you! These things need time, man! She was only your first girlfriend. The firsts always hurt the worst, but it's not the end of the world, and it's not like you can never love again. You need to talk to some new women. Go visiting to some new towns and just clear your head. Just try to clear your mind of everything, and do, feel, be whatever first comes out.
Time, man. These things take time.
4. i think being yourself and being comfortable and happy about that is one of the most attractive qualities in someone. someone who is self secure, comfortable and happy to be themselves regardless. you should be yourself and not this what you call a "man". a real man cares and appreciates a woman but he also appreciates himself.
5. i'm very sorry about losing your first love, that is VERY hard.
from a girls prospective, if you're putting on this jerk routine, you will attract girls that are a)acting as b*tchy as you are jerky b)have no standards c)arent generally ladies. a nice girl needs a nice guy. you'l end up wasting your time wiht girls that arent right for you, and those ARE the type that will break your heart.
be a nice guy to all the girls you meet. the one for you is out there!
6. You need some psychiatric help.....get some. That you would let ONE relationship dictate the relationships that you have for the rest of your life isn't good. Get some help and have a good life! It is out there, you just need some help in getting it.
7. If you want to be a "man" in a woman's eyes, be who you are. Otherwise you're just "some guy".
Women are inexplicably attracted to the "bad boy" image, which your careless arrogance seems to portray...but once the novelty is worn off, they'll lose interest too.
Act like yourself and not only will you attract a great gal who cares about YOU (instead of your alter-ego), you'll keep her
8. Needless confidence? why is confidence needless? Confidence is very important with women! Lord knows we're unconfident enough! lol Sorry but true deep down. First of all I just got out of a 7 year relationship with a man that told me he was never "in love" with me. That was an ouch and a half. It hurts but we take something from every relationship we make and we use that something to hopefully never make the same mistakes again in the next. She lost interest then she wasn't the ONE. What is so wrong with being alone for a while to lick the wounds from your last relationship? Be yourself and get to really know yourself. What you really like in a person and not like. Be picky for a change, your aloud. The healthiest relationship we can create in our lives is the one we have with ourselves and people tend to look that over. How can you go around giving people the false you? It's hard but I don't even think about dating and sex and all that mess. It comes to me and when I'm ready for it, I'm ready. Until then I wait and take care of me first. Good luck, hun. Hope I make a little sense.
9. oooohhhhh..... its deep. It can go deeper if you want to...
if something hurts-- you do something to heal it. DONT STOP UNTIL YOU FIGURE IT OUT. Because if you try something AND NOT MAKE IT WORK it means IT WONT WORK.
Godd Luck!
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