The guy I've been dating for a little while now invited me to stay the night at his place this week. This obviously means sex (of course he didn't say that though)... but it's also kind of that point in the relationship where we always want more after kissing..
I said i was interested in staying over, but the thing is (I just realized) I will be getting my period... I hope it doesn't deceive him or anything that I come over and then we can't have sex, if that's what things lead to!
I thought mentioning my period to him now would be silly... because it would totally say that all our night will be good for is sex, lol And yea, kind of, but you don't SAY IT!!!
Is it still ok to accept an invitation like that when I have my period? :P
Should I postpone for another time? But then what excuse would I give? Saying that I have my period is implying that the night would be useless just because we can't have sex- I find that sounds bad.
What do you guys think? I'm 20, him 24.What should I do
Answers:
1. 5 hours ago
I also don't want to bring up 'sex' because he hasn't. (but i know its in the back of both of our minds :P:P)
2. better tell the truth about your physical condition. it would be a big let down if this is not clear. and its about time you guys talked about sex!
3. You're 20. You should know better.
If you are going to decline the invitaton simply because you're worried that he's just gonna want sex, why are you with him? When your in a relationship it shouldn't matter either way! If he really cares he'd understand.
I'd just tell him. I stayed over a guy's house that i was just SEEING and told him we couldn't have sex because I was on my period so he said that's fine and that was that... he still wanted to spend time with me.
Don't feel silly: straight up accept the invitation and when you get there tell him you have your period
4. most women think men only think of sex. sometimes we think about BJs also. If you say no, you may not be invited again
5. hes 24 he knows what a period is. tell him point blank "I have my period if you planne dto have sex we can't' I REAL boyfriend would say come over anyway just to spend time together. besides you period won't last the whole week.
6. Is it Safe To Have Sex During Your Period?
Many men and women worry that having sexual intercourse during a woman’s period is unhealthy. Though frowned upon in many cultures and faiths, sexual intercourse during menstruation is entirely normal and completely healthy.
Worries about this act generally stem from societal misconceptions about menstrual blood: most girls are taught from a young age that their menstrual blood is unclean and "dirty," and therefore should be hidden and contained at all times. However, menstrual blood is an entirely natural bodily fluid, and does not in anyway affect a man’s penis or a woman’s reproductive tract. As long as you are engaging in safe and protected sexual intercourse, it is entirely alright for you and your partner to have sex during your period.
7. whoa i woul be uncomfortable around anyone when im seeing my period, just be plain i am having my period so we are not able to have sex but ill love to keep your company and snuggle and talk and i hope you undertsand. take care, good luck in your relationship.
8. You should tell him. I say oh I'm on my monthly. And if he doesn't like having sex when you are flowing he will suggest another day or say let's just go to a movie. You can have sex when you are flowing I bring my own towel to put under me.. Oral is out though.
9. This is actually a very good question. It's also a great way to TEST his character.
Here is what you do.
First off, while most people would probably agree that the subtext to "spending the night" means sex, it reality it doesn't necessarily mean that. I can't tell you how many times I've had women spend the night where I slept on the couch or vice versa. It's called I-respect-a-woman's-boundaries...
This is how a healthy, mature woman would approach this very situation.
First, they would respect themselves and wait a while before giving it up (men do not respect women who give it up quickly NO MATTER what they say). Secondly, they would let nature take its course, yet they would know full well what their own boundaries are based on their beliefs (secular, religious, or both).
If things get beyond kissing and it's clear that there's going to possibly be sex, that's when you have to say "I'd like to but I'm on my period."
Anytime a woman has told me that I have taken her at face value and believed her. This does NOT mean you have to stop what you are doing, you can satisfy one another in ways where your period is not really an issue. Just remember if he gets to a certain point where he's really horny then you should make sure he gets to the point of completion with the undertsanding that when you are not on your period it will be your turn to receive.
A mature and emotionally healthy man will not object to this and will take it in stride.
If he gets pissed, then guess what.....you are with the wrong guy.
It's really that simple. Simple does NOT mean easy and a lot of people avoid these difficult conversations because they don't want to risk upsetting the other person OR they dislike confrontation.
But if you really think about it this is actually a really good opportunity to see what this guy is made of. I'll never forget this woman who I was dating for a while who wanted to have sex with me, but it was right after playing basketball and I had gotten hit in my pubic area really hard by an errant kick. It was so painful down there I went to the doctor and he said that my General need some rest.
Well I still went over my date's apartment, the action got pretty heavy and when she went to touch me down there I gently grabbed her hand and told her what had happened to me. She totally understood and we ended up making dinner together and then cuddling to a movie.
You don't always have to have sex to have a good time (though gosh darn it, it's in my top 3!!!).
Rod
10. Why not be honest with him but don't make sex be the reason? To me there could definitely be physical reasons I might not want to sleep over night at his house if I was menstruating. Accidents could happen, you could just feel uncomfortable or awkward about it since it can be such a private and personal time with the often accompanying discomfort.
Why not just tell him you have realized it will be "that time of the month" and your having reservations about it because you may feel more comfortable at home with your midol and hot water bottle? That would take sex out of the discussion and let him know your not trying to reject him? If he offers to let you borrow his hot water bottle or offers chocolate, you will know he understands it will be a more platonic weekend than he had maybe hoped and snatch him up ...especially if he offers chocolate! LOL
11. You said yourself that you both want more after kissing.
I would just tell him. You dont have to flat out say Hey guess what I am in my period. When I first met my boyfriend I just told him that I wasn't able at the moment and he put two and two together.
You can still make him happy with out actually having intercourse. If he is the type of guy that is going to make you feel bador uncomfortable for being on your period then he's probably too immature for the relationship.
Good Luck and don't be too nervous to say what you have to say.
12. I guess it depends, when i'm on my period I hate spending the night at other people's houses. Sex would be the last thing on my mind. If you don't want to stay the night just say that you have to work early or your mom needs you that day. But you could tell him the real reason and say that you aren't feeling well, because of cramps, and you wont be good company that week.
13. He will understand. Still accept the invitation and warn him before he gets too wound up. He's interested in you and if he really likes you, he will wait.
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