I am the middle child even though I just two minutes older than my twin. I'm 18 and my parents have been treating me bad since I was little. They are much muuuch harder on me than my older brother and younger sister. I get really good grades at college, I got a good job offer, I drive well and take car of the cars, I get scholarships, I'm pretty well rounded. But, it's never good enough for them. I am blamed for my siblings' problems like I made them do it. I feel like I have to babysit my sister cause she does a lot of stupid stuff and my parents blame me for it. They also tell me how much I'm ruining my life because of my boyfriend because he isn't as great as they want him to be. I'm already making plans to move out because I've had enough of this. Years I've been mistreated and I don't want to sit back. I'm 18 and they still try to control every aspect of my life. (Cont.)
Answers:
1. 5 hours ago
My relationship with my parents and family is slowly thining to nothing but there's nothing I can do when they shut me out from everything the 4 of them do. My dad also favors my other two siblings over, I'm seen as their "Smart kid" to everyone else, like I'm suppose to get them money for being successful. My boyfriend always mentions how crappy they treat me and can tell I've been slipping more into depression over the past few years. I've even been on the fence about taking anti-depressants because of how they treat me. I just can't take it here anymore. I'd rather not move out since I'm not financially ready (But my bf has a house and a good job, I'm working on it and we both go to college) but there's is no way I can last much longer with my parents. I haven't talked to them in several days now. They won't even look at me or say hello. I feel like they don't even care about me anymore.
2. 5 hours ago
The reason why with my boyfriend is that we are planning on getting married and he is really helping me out a lot. I know if we were just friends, he would do the same for me. It's the only place I know I go securely. It will also give me the ability to save money because rent is extremely cheap there. And also, in the state we live in, there is no common-law marriage. I don't know why, it just doesn't exist here.
3. Yes... get out of there.
Setting yourself free will do you a world of good.
Your parents are leaving you holding the bag all the way around. You are un-paid help for them.
Once you are out you don't have to return... ever. Of course, that means that the parents will start harassing their other two kids.
Something about birth order... the first/only male can never do any wrong in a lot of circumstances. The first born kid gets all the best. The baby of the family is often coddled into her 30s.
I generally don't advise of moving in with boyfriends, but this might be a good stepping-off point for the time being. See if you can make it work more like a room-mate situation.
Cohabitation not a good idea unless you can maintain boundaries until there is an engagement ring and a set wedding date. You really don't want the "common-law marriage" route because of the liabilities for you.
Anti-depressant drugs are nasty. Hit the health food store and get something called "Holy Basil"... I like the stuff by New Chapter... it will lift the cloud off you and help you to focus... and it is also an anti-oxidant.
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