My fiance and I dated long distance for 6 years. We got engaged 5 months ago and she moved in with me. The first 3 months were fine, but the last 2 have been terrible. She has become so selfish. She demands that the temperature be as cold as she wants it, the shows we watch are hers, the time we spend together is on her watch, and we haven't been "intimate" in ages. She also makes me sleep in the guest room ALL the time bc she says she doesn't sleep well with me in the bed. Tonight I told her I wanted to sleep in my own bed for once and at a temperate that wasn't ice cold and she FREAKED out. I called her out on it and said that I always let her have her way and just this once I wanted it my way and if she didn't do it then she was just selfish. She got pissed saying that I was making her feel bad about herself and she totally turned it around...getting mad at me and slamming doors. This is getting insane!! I have tried talking nicely and she keeps getting worse. Should I end it?
Answers:
1. Erm, I'd get out now - she's a control freak & unless she gets some help she will only get worse.
Good luck.
2. How about writing down the way you feel about this in a letter to her, as it sounds like she'll take anything you say the wrong way. If she ignores this letter then be warned. she does not care about your feelings in the slightest. However maybe she does care, and just took your suggestion as an attack for whatever reason (hormones, insecurity etc). In this case she should respond to your letter.
3. sorry but you hit the nail on the head. seems like living at home she always got what she wanted and now that shes moved out it was good but now her true colours are showing.
relationships are about compromise 50/50 you can take but you got to learn how to give. if she cannot do this then ask her to move back home temporily and see if things get any better. it seems like you have so much, you wouldnt wana throw it all away. try talking calmly about the situation and tell her you need some space or compromise.
4. If this is how it is now and you guys aren't even married yet..imagine what it will be like then..Remember, you cannot change anyone, you can only help those who want to change on their own..and from the sound of it, it doesn't seem like that will be happening anytime soon.
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